


Fili's Secret

by Anathema_Cat



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Dry Humping, M/M, Off-screen Relationship(s), Porn with Feelings, Sibling Incest, Smut, Swearing, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 10:56:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8369605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anathema_Cat/pseuds/Anathema_Cat
Summary: Fili had a secret. Everyone (surely) knew that Fili was strong and fast, brave and chill, attractive and - well, all-around awesome. Everyone should've known that Fili could sing - even if he only got (grudging) credit for that from his brother. Kili knew even more about Fili. His secret may come as a surprise.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A big thank you to [deanohell](http://archiveofourown.org/users/deanohell/pseuds/deanohell) \- beta reader extraordinaire - and [khafushun](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Khafushun/pseuds/Khafushun) \- headcanon master - for their help and encouragement! This story is inspired by Fíli, [FiKi Week 2016](http://gatheringfiki.tumblr.com/post/152171330400/fiki-week-oct-23-29-2016) Day 2, and a khafushun idea about Fíli, arrogance, and an attractive brother.

Fili had a secret. Fili was strong and fast, a star college athlete. But that was well known. He was cool, too. He assumed that was recognized. That he was among the best looking at school must certainly be obvious. 

Fili was gay. That wasn't a surprise, either. Even before he was out, he didn't date the beautiful girls expected of someone of his status, and he was always among the first to speak up for gay rights - and stand up against any bigotry really, whenever it arose. If he had his linemen behind him most of the time, well, that was no knock against Fili's - acknowledged - bravery.

Fili shouldered into the raucous house party, met by a wall of heat and noise. As he strode through the party in search of his brother, he was greeted with team battle yells, fistbumps, nods, chin lifts, and a cheap beer shoved into his hand. “I don't drink this shit, man,” he said to the crowd in general before taking a swig and handing it to someone else. 

Fili grabbed the arm of a passing teammate who lived in the house. “Seen Kili?” he yelled. 

“I love this song, man!” the athlete responded, punching Fili in the shoulder. Fili pressed his eyes closed for just a second and pursed his lips, but he resisted the eye roll - and patting himself on the back for his infinite patience. 

“Kili?” he tried again.

The jackass nodded and said something else about the song. Judging by his level of coherence, his buddy had been here awhile. Was Fili seriously the only one who did homework, who took the tutors up on their offers? He glanced around at too many familiar faces. Shit, he'd be the only one left on the team next quarter. 

“I would be able to tell what song this is if you had a halfway decent sound system,” he yelled.

The idiot smiled with a thumbs up and bobbed away through the crowd. Fili shook his head and moved on.

Fili had a date. Well, not officially a date, but he had plans with the person he had more fun with than anyone else. That wasn't a secret either. Two peas in a pod, his mom called them when they were young; cut from the same cloth - thank you, Grandpa. Last Christmas, their grandmother had actually used “bromance” in the same sentence as their names. Their _grandmother_ for fuck’s sake. Whatever - they had some teenage disputes back when they self-consciously tried to distinguish themselves from each other, but they were long over that. They liked the same shit and had a similar sense of humor, along with complementary personalities.

He found Kili a level down, slouched on a bar stool and leaning back against the wall. His brother’s eyes were alternating between a beer pong game and an impromptu dance floor while he talked to the people standing and sitting near him. Fili headed for Kili like he was pulled on a string, eyes focused on the dark hair and eyes. 

Fili was waylaid by another drunk teammate. So close to his prize. Damn it. 

“My sister wants to dance with you,” the big guy yelled, nodding toward her, his words slurred over the thumping of the tinny music. 

“Dude,” Fili yelled. “I'm gay.” 

“Yeah man,” this particular idiot said, slinging an arm around him and turning him toward the dancers. “For some reason she still thinks you're cute and said it would be a ‘fuck you’ to her ex. And I hate that guy!”

“Well you fucking dance with her then!”

The glazed eyes widened hilariously slowly. “She's my sister!” he said with unassailable logic. 

Fili laughed, flicking a glance over his shoulder toward Kili. Their eyes caught and held, and Kili raised an arched eyebrow. Fili raised his in return, rolled his eyes, and was rewarded with a grin.

Fili turned back to his obstacle. “Come on, man, most of the team is here. Someone else will do it.”

“You’re the only one who can dance,” his buddy said, eyebrows drawing together. Well. That was more persuasive. Fili couldn’t argue with that.

 

Fili could drag his body away from Kili, but his mind was another matter. Fili loved his brother. Fili _loved_ his brother. Surprisingly, this wasn't a secret either - at least not from the object of his affection, although it would have to be from everyone else. Fili mentally shrugged like he always did when that thought arose. They would just move or something.

No, Fili was 95.7% sure he was disgustingly transparent to Kili and 98.3% certain that Kili shared his feelings. Fili felt his brother’s eyes following him while he performed his strangely chivalrous duty in front of a sullen loser who eventually crushed his beer can and stomped out. Kili’s expression didn’t change, but his eyes sparkled and they’d occasionally rove down Fili’s body. Fili smiled and licked his lips, trying in vain to focus on his pretty dance partner.

Fili finally made it to his goal, and the dumbass was chewing on a cheap cigar. “What the fuck is that?” Fili smirked, crinkling his nose. “You look like you're from Arkansas.”

“I _am_ from-,” Kili began, eyes wide. “Hey! I look like a railroad baron. Or a baller.”

“You look like a hick.” A bizarrely adorable one with long silky hair, but anyway. “Where'd you get that thing?”

“Devin. His dad brought him Cubans back from his trip.”

“Kee,” Fili grinned. “That's not a Cuban.”

Kili jerked it from his mouth and examined it. “How the fuck would you know, dickhead?”

“I know. Get rid of it, dumbass. Let's go.”

Kili’s eyes sparkled again even as he blushed and grumbled “you’re the dumbass of the family”. He jumped up and tossed the cigar in a trash can.

 

They blasted music with cold wind in their hair, and Kili sipped on the party drink he took ‘to go’ on the 45-minute drive to the closest city. The outskirts held a dance club with bartenders who looked the other way on underage drinking if they were comfortable with the person buying drinks.

Fili liked to watch Kili dance. This was probably obvious to Kili, who would head for the dance floor with his first drink while Fili drank his with eyes glued on Kili. 

This also should’ve been apparent to everyone else, but something blocked his view of Kili’s first moves. Fili leaned to the side, the thing followed him, and the thing may have been yelling at him. Fili took a deep breath and then glared at the obstacle. “What?!”

“Dance with me, baby.” A tall, thin guy who thought he was hot stuff raised his eyebrows suggestively at Fili. 

Fili snorted. _Right, like this joker deserves_ this _body._ “You’re in my way, man,” he yelled.

“What?!”

“Move.”

“What?!”

Fili reached out his left arm and - gently - moved the guy out of his field of vision. He nodded, eyes back on Kili. “You were in my way,” he yelled.

Fili watched Kili dance, slim hips twisting and that ass - he couldn’t think straight if he kept watching that. He shook his head and brought his eyes up to his brother’s lidded ones, looking back over his shoulder at the lucky girl grinding up against him.

His brother danced with a lot of women, who danced right back. This was a little perplexing to Fili given that Kili was unabashedly gay. And they frequented a gay-friendly dance club. Granted, a variety of people came here, but judging by the grins and exaggerated ass shaking, they simply appreciated the brilliance of his brother in motion. He toasted their good taste with a long satisfying pull of alcohol.

Fili had to admit his brother had _moves_. He was forced to acknowledge this after attempting a couple in the privacy of his bedroom. Fili was realistic. He could dance - hell, apparently his friends’ family members knew he could dance - but he looked like a middle-aged ape when attempting things Kili made look effortless. He never mentioned this to his brother. 

Fili scanned the crowd, just like he did each time. People struggling to attract people who were trying to attract other people, dressed up and strutting and preening and unaware that one dark person outshone them all. Fili’s eyes wouldn’t catch on anyone - not since Kili had graduated high school. He had given into a few propositions just to make sure, and yeah, he was sure. No one could possibly match him but Kili. And damn, that ass- 

After a few more moments of pleasant views, Fili tossed his cup and snaked his way through the dancers to the vicinity of the one he wanted. He ignored appraising eyes and let himself sink into the thumping music and flashing lights and joy of movement. Every brush of hands and shared smile confirmed the truth he couldn’t escape - Kili really was the only one for him.

 

“I want a boyfriend, Fee,” Kili murmured as they drove home. Fili was sober after drinking only water for the past hour and a half. Kili, slumped down in the seat with a leg on the dashboard, looked like he had a pleasant buzz going.

“Why do you only dance with women?” Fili asked. 

Kili turned adorably red. Interesting. “They dance better than dudes,” he grumbled.

“Well you can’t complain about being single if you don’t ever give the dudes a chance,” Fili laughed.

“I’m not complaining, jackass,” Kili snapped. “Just making a statement.”

“Uh huh.”

Kili looked down at his steepled fingers, bottom lip jutted out adorably.

Fili could sing. He believed that was something everyone should know, but sadly, he didn’t get the recognition he deserved. Whatever - he enjoyed it and was certain Kili did, too.

“‘There’s a club if you’d like to go,’” he crooned. “‘You could meet somebody who really looooves you. So you go and you stand on your own and you leave on your own and -’”

“Fuck off, Fili,” Kili - rudely - cut him off. “You don’t even like that song.”

“I like it.”

“You always make fun of me for liking it.”

“I make fun of you for liking the most popular songs of bands you otherwise don’t like.”

Kili glanced over and grinned, face lighting up. “That song transcends. Transcendent. Transcends something. Greatness.” He gave up. “It’s a _good_ song.”

Fili laughed. “It’s a good song, Kee.”

A few moments of comfortable silence, and Fili tried again. “So, why? Really?”

Kili started. “Why what?”

“Why only women?” Fili pressed, sure, so sure now. Pretty sure. Hopeful.

Kili turned his beautiful eyes on him, and Fili swore he could feel them blazing on his skin. His hands tightened on the steering wheel, knuckles whitening, eyes straight ahead. _Fucking hell, I better be right._

Fili took a deep breath and risked a quick glance. Kili looked thoughtful, eyebrows furrowed over slightly glazed eyes. He glanced at Fili, then back down at his hands. “I’m drunk,” he said, unusually quiet. “Don’t want to say anything I’ll regret.”

Fili’s stomach did a flip, and he badly wanted to push Kili, to say aloud how he felt, to- but no. The timing wasn’t right. Almost, but not quite. He sighed. “Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sure,” Kili shrugged with poorly feigned nonchalance - which Fili kindly ignored. “Tomorrow.”

\-----

Kili watched Fili burst through the door and stride in like he owned the place. This was stupid because Kili paid exactly half the rent. And they rented. The sweaty bastard had clearly just been in the weight room and hadn't bothered to shower there. Hair tied up and humming tunelessly, he carelessly threw a bag on a chair and headed into the kitchen. He opened the fridge, popped open a can and guzzled whatever it was with the door still open. The door shut, and he wandered back out with two peeled hard-boiled eggs in his hands. He stopped short in the process of shoving one in his mouth whole. 

Those too pretty blue eyes went wide as he finally noticed Kili sprawled in Fili's favorite armchair. "Arfmph," he said, waving a hand toward Kili. 

"And a good afternoon to you, my eloquent brother," Kili said. "You're wondering why I'm home so early."

Fili nodded, chewing. It boggled Kili's mind that this meathead who he had seen in every unflattering light possible could be so magnetic, so utterly attractive to him. But that's just the way it was. "Why?" Fili managed around the masticated egg.

Kili eyed him, body languorous from his long shower. For as long as he could remember, Fili felt like his other half. They just _got_ each other. It didn’t hurt that he had such an amazing body. And those piercing eyes. And pretty hair. 

The shower had squashed Kili’s last remnants of nervousness. He had made his decision. He blinked slowly and looked up at his brother through his eyelashes. "We started something, and I want to finish it."

Fili's eyes somehow got wider, and he straightened as he grasped Kili's intent. He backed up very slowly, eyes locked on Kili's, and set the other egg on the bar. The arm dropped limply to his side. "I."

"I don't know what god or gods or fate or whatever saddled me with you,” Kili said, “but we _belong_ together." 

\-----

Kili had his glossy hair pulled up in a high ponytail, wisps falling out around his face. One long leg was flung over the arm of his chair, arms out to either side. Like he owned the fucking thing. He'd probably gotten crumbs all over it, too. Fucker. "You're in my chair."

"We belong together, dickhead. Come share it with me."

"I," he tried again to get words out of his very, very dry mouth. Jesus Christ, Kili was hot. And he wasn't about to let the shit control this situation. "I need a shower."

Yeah, this wasn't what Fili had planned. He thought he'd be clean and dressed up and they'd work shit out over dinner and drinks. Kili was uncharacteristically silent, letting Fili squirm, damn him, big brown eyes inviting and impatient. "Okay, so I'll take a shower," Fili said. "Then we can make sure - You know. I want you to be sure. There's no going back."

Kili swung his leg down, leaned forward. "No going back, huh, Einstein? That's the wisdom ya got for our jacked up relationship?"

“Bastard,” Fili managed as his heart skipped a beat. Kili was the only person who could make him flustered - not even the nastiest coach or the most threatening tackle had ever put him off his game. His palms were sweaty and his jaw clenched, exhilarated and infuriated. 

They glared at each other, and Fili wasn't willing to break first. He pursed his lips, then licked them. Kili's eyes followed the movement. _Got him._ "I’m ‘saddled’ with you, too, for fuck's sake. I want to stay friends with you and not ruin what we already have because we're sex-starved morons."

"I'm not-"

"You haven't fucked anyone since I walked in on you and my fucking doppelgänger."

Kili blushed, rubbed the back of his neck. _Got him again._

"Fuck off," Kili growled.

Fili, too, had messed around with guys he thought with his eyes closed he could pretend were Kili. Three times before he admitted it didn't work. Kili didn't need to know that - as far as Fili knew, it only took Kili once to figure it out. Kili was the smart one. Something else he wasn’t going to say aloud.

One of the many things he loved about Kili hit him low in the gut as the fucker recovered almost immediately and went back on the offensive. He stood up and slinked toward Fili, looking him up and down. "I want _you_."

"Fuck, you're gorgeous, Kee." Fili couldn't help it, his brother's lean muscles took his breath away. Still. _Fuuuck._ "You could have anyone you want."

"You're gorgeous, Fee, you could have anyone you want," Kili repeated, just a hint of mocking in his voice.

"I know." Fili squared his shoulders, exhaled. "I want you." 

Kili stepped into Fili's space, and Fili's heart thudded. "And I said I want you," Kili breathed. "What's the problem?"

"I need a shower."

"You're filthy and I love it." 

Fili's heart stopped on a sharp inhalation. He was sure his brother's voice had dropped an octave.

Fili shook his head, and he let go. He closed the space and pressed his lips against Kili's.

They sighed in tandem. Ridiculous. 

\-----

Kili closed his eyes and couldn't help a whimper of relief as he finally felt Fili’s lips on his. He had been as close to sure as one could be about another person’s feelings, but now he _knew_ , and oh did it feel as good as he always imagined it would. 

Fili was beautiful. Jaw-droppingly, unmistakably, painfully gorgeous, pretty and muscular, meticulously groomed and masculine, funny and thoughtful. Kili once feared everyone would want his brother - he now knew it didn't matter. Fili belonged with him. 

He jammed his fingers in Fili’s hair, remembered the hair tie, pulled it out and dropped it, and then pulled Fili’s face up into his. Fili said “mmm” or “mmfph”, probably “mmm”, and parted his lips enough for Kili to wrap the bottom one in his. 

They savored soft lips, gliding over each other, before their tongues touched and Kili’s hands tightened in his brother’s hair. Fili brought his hands to Kili’s face, almost reverently laying palms on Kili’s cheek, fingers relaxing behind Kili’s head. Head tilted just slightly, Kili pushed his tongue into his brother’s warm - inviting, fuck, so inviting - mouth and was met with a definite moan. Kili was already losing his grasp on coherence as their tongues entwined, slowly at first, tasting, testing. Kili moved his hands to Fili’s back, felt - finally _felt_ \- the muscles shifting under his hands.

The kiss deepened, tongues pushing into each other, smooth and slow. Fili slid one hand behind Kili’s neck and the other slowly down to Kili’s shoulder, squeezed, then around to rest on the small of his back. “Fili,” Kili murmured into his brother’s mouth. Their breathing sped up, Kili’s heart thudded, his head felt light.

Kili gently pulled back, kissed Fili’s top lip, looked into shining eyes gone dark. “I want you to fuck me.”

“Now?” Fili stammered between gasps. 

“Yes, now, idiot,” he grinned. Kili moved back to Fili’s mouth with a smile that brushed against beard. “If you can last that long.”

Kili felt Fili return the smile, and fuck was it sexy. “Fucker. Can you?”

Kili laughed pure joy. “Probably not.” He glided across warm swollen lips with his own. “Want to try.”

“God, Kee, you’re so fucking hot,” Fili breathed, freezing Kili in place with intensity. Both his hands were on Kili's back now, pulling him closer.

“And you,” Kili said through kisses. “Fuck me.”

Fili pulled back again - barely - and they were so close. Eyes locked, Kili felt like Fili was seeing into his soul, and they were sharing short breaths, and it was so intense. With a sharp inhale, they crushed their mouths together again. Fili’s hands slid down to Kili’s ass with a moan, and then Kili was up in Fili’s arms. Kili gasped and their tongues fought for dominance as Kili tangled his hands in Fili's hair again, dick hard against his brother’s stomach, chests pressed together. And they were moving, so smoothly, fuck Fili was strong, and turning into a bedroom, and- 

Kili broke the kiss noisily, eyes barely cracked open. “Why your room?”

“Closer,” Fili breathed, and Kili smirked his agreement before diving back in. 

Fili’s strength allowed him to be unexpectedly gentle when he wanted to be. Kili learned that now when in stark contrast to his heat, Fili laid Kili on the bed with a grace that took away whatever breath Kili had left to him. Kili would've had to toss Fili down, not that they would've minded, but-

Fili’s weight pressed on him, and the kiss got sloppier and wetter. Kili ran his hands down Fili’s back and then up to his shoulders and pushed. Fili pulled back with a pull on Kili’s bottom lip, sat up on his knees, and with a heated glance they were tugging off their own t-shirts. 

Kili about lost it then, faced with shining chest hair and muscles. His head dropped back as he finally ran his hands down Fili’s chest, and lightly by his crotch and “fuuuuck”. Fili’s lidded eyes traced Kili’s torso and then with a “fucking hell”, he was back down, pushing his tongue into Kili’s waiting mouth, scalding chests pressed together. Fili found and tangled his hands into Kili’s, pulling them just over Kili’s head on the bed. “Mmm,” Kili breathed as Fili rocked his hips.

Kili pressed his hips up to meet Fili’s motion, the gasps and moans picking up speed as their erections rubbed and strained, and this was going to be embarrassing, but Kili was going to explode. He squeezed Fili’s hands, pulled his free with a whispered “Fee” as Fili dragged his open mouth down Kili’s neck to nuzzle the crook. Kili grabbed Fili’s ass, grinding them together harder, and Fili’s hands were in his hair, a beautiful whine escaping, and heat pooled in Kili’s middle and his eyes rolled back, and here it came, and he shuddered and yelled as he came. Hard. In his pants. Breathing hard, he kept his hips moving until Fili followed him over the edge with a shout.

Fili collapsed on Kili, and they huffed a laugh in tandem. Ridiculous.

\-----

Fili swaggered when he moved. This was a secret to exactly no one - except Fili. It wasn’t a self-conscious affectation, and so it never bothered Kili and he never thought to tease. It was just, well, Fili. So while Kili slowly clambered off the bed and peeled off his sticky clothes and awkwardly wiped at the mess, his brother, the fucker, looked as smooth and comfortable as if going about his regular routine. 

Fili caught Kili watching him. And that confidence faltered oh so slightly as Fili’s eyes flickered and caught on Kili’s. He had apparently just recognized they were naked together. 

They shared a ridiculously shy smile, and then he was wrapped in Fili’s strong arms. Fili kissed his shoulder as Kili wrapped his arms around Fili’s back and squeezed.

 

“God I’m so glad you love me, too,” Kili murmured.

“Me, too, Kee,” Fili whispered. “Me, too.”

Fili guided them back down on the bed. They faced each other, hands clasped. Fili pushed hair behind Kili’s ears. Kili eyes followed his own hand as he ran it down Fili’s side.

“Did you ever feel guilty? About.” Kili waved the hand before resting it on Fili’s waist. “This?”

Fili shook his head, blue eyes distant. “It eventually occurred to me that I should. I just never - I could never find that, you know?” He brought his focus back to Kili.

“I know.”

\-----

Fili smiled at the pensiveness in his brother’s voice. Kili’s emotions ran deep - and fast. It would be gone in a moment. Kili was looking down, lashes dark against pale skin, and there it goes- The gorgeous brown eyes were running up Fili’s chest and shoulders, and ah. Gone. 

“You are so fucking beautiful, you asshole, I didn’t have a fucking chance,” Kili said, eyes twinkling. “Fucker.”

Fili laughed as he pushed errant hair behind Kili’s ear - again - and ran his thumb over Kili’s arched eyebrow, palm on his cheek.

“Beautiful,” Fili repeated, eyes locked on his beautiful boy, the boyish face, and the no longer boyish body. Fuck, all that black hair and dark nipples, and his dick was already getting interested again. He ran his hand down Kili’s neck and over his chest, pressed his hand over Kili’s heart and leaned forward with a gentle kiss. Then he looked down as he passed his hand over one nipple, and over to the other, and Kili gasped. 

Fili pressed his hand on one hard pectoral, leaned forward and kissed Kili’s chin, neck, nipped at the nape, felt and heard Kili’s breath pick up. Kili’s hand squeezed his waist, Fili’s dick was stirring, and fuck Kili was hot, and he slid down to caress the other pec with his lips. He glanced up to see Kili watching him, and the lust on Kili’s face made _him_ gasp. He looked back at the nipple and licked it. “Mm, Kili.”

“Shit, so good,” Kili moaned.

Fili’s thumb swirled around the other nipple, hair tickling his hand, as he lightly teased this one with his lips and tongue, and Kili whined. Fili had an errant thought about going slowly, and he laughed it away as Kili brought his hand up to the back of Fili’s head and pressed it to his chest. Oh, no, this was heat and lust, and they had _forever_ to explore. 

“Oh fuck, Kee, I want you,” he whispered around the areola, and then he was sucking and Kili was writhing, and oh yes, he was going to fuck Kili, and his heart was pounding, and his dick was so fucking hard - again - and he moved down, sucking, nibbling, and Kili- 

“Oh christ, Fili, don’t think I can handle-” 

Fili pushed Kili onto his back, pushed a knee between Kili’s legs, ran his hands down Kili’s side. Kili’s long fingers fumbled on Fili’s back and ended up caressing Fili’s shoulders as his moans picked up. Fili settled down over Kili’s thighs, hands on his hips, his mouth working his way to Kili’s inner thigh. 

Fili gave mind-blowing head. That was almost a secret. Only a very few had been deemed worthy, none of them recent. He wanted Kili in his mouth - so bad. 

Kili kicked a heel as Fili licked the crease of his leg and then forced himself to move his tongue slowly up to the hair just above Kili’s erection. Fuck, Kili smelled like comfort and sex and soap and come, and he licked the base of Kili’s dick on a sharp inhale from Kili. 

“God, fuck, Fili,” he whispered. “I’ve got come all over me.”

“Yeah,” Fili breathed. He turned his head to lick down the shaft to the head, and grinned as Kili completely stopped breathing. “Lick you clean.” 

Fili was rewarded with an amusing, choking groan. “Oh fuck, Fee. So. Hot.”

And with painstaking patience, because fuck if Fili didn’t just want to suck off his brother right now, Fili tongued the tip, brought a hand up to cup balls, and then slowly drew the head into his mouth. Tongue lightly pressing on frenulum, he suckled the head.

“Fuck,” Kili breathed, “oh my fucking god. Oh my god.”

Almost gone with desire, Fili forced himself to have mercy on his brother. He pulled back, lips brushing head. “You gonna live?”

“Fucking Christ, Fee,” Kili’s fingers dug into Fili’s shoulders, and then one moved up to grasp a handful of hair. “Fucking hell. No I’m fucking _not_.”

Fili couldn’t help it. He flicked his tongue. Kili yelped. Fili smirked. “Want me to stop?”

“You are too good, why so good, too good,” Kili panted, trying in vain to slow his breath. “Fuck meee.”

“Now?” Fili pulled the head into his mouth. He looked up and grinned. Then he sucked in part of the shaft. _So good._ He at least wanted a taste if Kili was going to stop him.

“Fiiiliiii, too good,” Kili pushed Fili off, sat up and dragged Fili up with surprising strength. He pressed his mouth to Fili’s and kissed him mercilessly, pulling back with a pop. “Next time. Fuck I want your mouth, but want you _in_ me more. Fee. Now,” his beautiful brother babbled. “This time. I fucking want you so bad.”

Fili breath hitched, and he wrapped a hand around Kili’s neck and pulled their faces together, tongues clashing in heat and need. They settled back down facing each other, hands roaming. The kiss became messy again, as Fili flung an arm backwards and fumbled around a nightstand for lube without breaking from Kili’s perfect lips. 

Things hit the wall and fell on the floor, and where was the fucking lube, because Kili’s hands were digging into his back and grabbing his ass, and their sweat was mixing, and fuuuck. “Got it!” he exclaimed, delirious, only it sounded more like “gomfin” in Kili’s mouth, and this was really happening, and they were pushing all their pent up desire and want into each other, and it would be fast and sloppy as these first kisses and he didn’t fucking care. 

Kili broke the kiss this time, and sucked his way down Fili’s neck. Fili gathered his wits enough to tease this hot fucking monster writhing next to him. “Told you - sex starved.” 

Kili bit Fili’s shoulder - flash of pain and lust - before bothering with a “tell me you don’t want me, dickhead.” 

Fili answered with a slick finger on Kili’s asshole, and Kili jumped and moaned and brought his mouth back up to Fili’s. 

“You want me,” he breathed into Fili’s waiting mouth, dark eyes on his.

Fili gasped at the beauty and lust as he worked his finger inside his fucking brother, and “Yeah. I fucking want you, you goddamn sexy fucker.”

Kili’s head dropped back, eyes closed, as Fili slowly worked him open, mouth moving to Kili’s neck and chest. Two fingers, and Kili’s body was moving with him. A sigh made Fili look up and catch his breath. Kili’s face was all blissed out and the sexiest fucking thing he’d ever seen, and he was going to fucking blow his load a second time without being touched if he didn’t get a move on it. But this was the one part that really couldn’t be rushed, so he forced himself to inhale, and the third was in. “Oh fuck me, Kee.”

“Your job, babe,” Kili murmured, eyes closed, writhing on Fili’s fingers with an “mm, nice.”

“You’re fucking dead.” And Fili’s patience was so gone, he _needed_ Kili, and Kili was- Laughing.

“Show me,” Kili grinned, flushed and stunning, and Fili had to smile back as he slipped his fingers out, and the smiles turned into kisses. Fili pushed Kili over onto his back, and lying on his side up against his brother, he lifted and held the long leg nearest him over his hip so he could slide his cock inside - inside - inside - fucking hell - up and inside of Kili. Their bodies flush, he dropped his forehead onto the pec closest to him, almost overwhelmed. He gulped air. “Kee. Kili.”

“Oh god, I fucking know,” Kili responded, gasping. Kili snaked his near arm around Fili’s neck and the far one up to rest hand on Fili’s chest. 

Fili wriggled his bottom arm up to hook around Kili’s neck, thumb under his ear. He lifted his head and looked up into black eyes. _Beautiful boy._

Kili pulled him in for a deep kiss before pulling back and pressing his forehead against his brother’s, eyes closed, holding for a moment. “Go,” Kili whispered.

Fili nodded, rocked his hips once and froze. He groaned. They were both done for. Fili lifted his top knee to support Kili’s leg and reached between their legs for Kili’s cock. Kili’s head dropped back, Fili dropped his back on Kili’s chest, he rolled his hips, and- Fucking hell, fuck, Kili was so tight and warm, and- “So. So good, Kili,” he stammered. 

They lifted heads and attempted a kiss, but there was no way, it was too intense, heads dropped back down, and it was all sweat and noise, and Fili heard his brother’s beautiful voice but couldn’t register words, and Kili was so damned amazing, he tried to tell him with his mouth on Kili’s chest, as many kisses and nips as he could manage as they moved together.

Fili’s world became pure physical sensation, Kili clutching at his shoulders, Fili vaguely aware of their mingled yelling, all feeling narrowing to his body’s connection to his brother’s, trying to keep his hand moving on Kili’s cock, groin tightening into too-intense too-focused stimulation, tensing, and then releasing in a rush of pleasure flowing over his body, Kili shaking, coming on his hand, and then- And then perfect peace for the moments their bodies shuddered to calm. 

The world emerged into focus as Fili caught his breath. He was connected to Kili. He always would be. He was so tired. He heard Kili’s breath slowing, felt Kili’s hand on his chest. He took one huge breath that he was sure felt like his first and gently pulled out of Kili.

Fili flopped onto his back, boneless, content. His hand found Kili’s and they just held on, staring toward the ceiling.

“I love you, Kili,” he murmured after a time, managing to turn his head to the side.

“I love you,” Kili responded with a grin and weak squeeze of his hand. 

They just looked at each other for a long time, too drowsy to move. Eventually, Fili found a shirt and wiped them off so they could curl together in a comforting, comfortable ball of tangled limbs and languorous bliss.

Fili drifted off to sleep in his brother’s arms - where he belonged. His only secret - the unfathomable, undeniable truth - was that it didn't bother him that it was his brother he loved. It never had. He knew now that it never would.


End file.
